I like to do crazy and drastic things sometimes, just shake it up and see what happens.
This drastic thing came partly out of necessity and partly of curiosity. I had an inkling that it could be a really great thing. And I was right. Turns out, the computer had become the centerpiece of our lives and it didn’t feel right. So I gave our borrowed computer back to my dad and cut the cord with Qwest.
Five years ago, we got rid of our tv because of the same problem. We had a few tv-free years and they were blissful. Mia soon turned into an insanely creative, calm and independent kid, and still is.
Then a couple of years ago, Alan “surprised” me with a nice little flatscreen tv that now hangs from the wall in our playroom. I was mad at first, but I like having it now. We use it for movies but don’t have commercial tv access on it.
Life without internet has left openness and quiet. My mind can think and wander about whatever it wants. It isn’t obsessing about Facebook or email or blogs or news. I am not worrying or feeling nervous or inadequate anymore (at least not all the time). Creativity is taking hold of me again. I want to make artist books like I did before I became obsessed with the internet. It feels great.
I’ve moved from the chair in front of the screen to the couch–where our family life happens. I am reading books. I am painting with my girls. I am (trying to) knit a mitten. I listen to Alan play guitar while Mia sings.
I’ve been able to fall asleep at night and stay asleep–something I have been dreaming of doing for years. Turns out, the blue-light screen was messing with the sleep center in my brain.
There’s more to tell, but I’ll leave that for another time at the library.