I think I have come to the conclusion that I must end a major relationship in my life. I think.

And that is my relationship with Facebook.

I have done this before, 4 times to be exact.  Why I keep going back, I do not know.

The feelings that Facebook gives me are these: inadequacy, invasion of privacy, guilt, regret, anger, frustration, fear of being disliked for who I am.  I feel like I am always at a party, like I have nowhere to hide and get some peace and quiet.

Then there is the occasional good feeling I get from being connected to my relatives that live far away or friends I do not see on a regular basis, and the good feeling of sharing something important to me and getting positive feedback.  And I suppose that is what has kept me coming back.

Facebook takes up an extraordinary amount of my time and mental energy, and in the time I have been a Facebook user, I have regretfully given more time to Facebook than individualized, deliberate time with my children.  And I emphasize this: regretfully.

Can I keep in touch with the people in my life without Facebook? I do not know.  I do hope so, on a certain level, at least.

Can I be happy without Facebook in my life? Absolutely.  Happier than I’ve been since Facebook peered its alluring face into my already full life.

I know that some people may be sad.  Others may not give a flying fart.  Others may be happy about it.

I want to live a peaceful and private life, one in which I live for me.  One in which I have the emotional energy to care for my children and family with my whole heart, one in which I am not put into inner turmoil over possibly saying the wrong thing and offending someone or reading other people’s upsetting posts.  I want to live without all of that.  I want a life without drama.

Do I leave quietly or with warning? Will I stick to my guns even when people beg me to stay?

We will see.