When it hurts

We have all experienced trauma of varying degrees.  Depending on our sensitivity levels, our coping mechanisms, and our awareness, these traumas affect each of us in unique ways. In some, they cause us to attract partners that hurt us, turn us into addicts of drugs, work or exercise, give us health problems, or make us anxious or depressed. Wherever there is trauma within us, there is also a little wounded child.

The more we nurture and acknowledge our wounded inner child, the less she will hurt.  Although she lives in the past, she is hurt in the present and very much shapes our lives in the “now”.   She can cause us to destroy our lives and run from relationships, or she can help us grow and become magnificent beings.

We expect those closest to us to understand our “soft spots”–our trauma and this little wounded child–and avoid hurting her and ever “going there”.  But it happens.  Perhaps it is impossible to avoid being hurt, and perhaps the hurt happens with a purpose.  Lessons tend to repeat themselves until they are fully understood.

If we actively work on healing the inner wounded child, each time she is hurt, we can rebound more quickly and be better able to judge the situation with logic.  Prescription or other drugs are not healing mechanisms, but rather they give us escape and a prolonging of our difficulties. To heal the inner wounded child, we have to look her in the eye.

When the primal self or inner wounded child takes over and goes into self-defense, our minds become irrational and we strike back, withdraw, or turn to destructive patterns.  This is the state in which we have the choice of walking the path of healing or the path of of destruction.  Choosing the path of healing is the only way to a whole and happy life.

Here is an excellent piece on healing the inner wounded child.

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