I’m feeling a lot better now. I slept through the night last night without coughing, and this is a major milestone. It means Alan can come back into our bed and things can be normal again. I go back to work next week.
I am grateful for Alan, the girls, my friend Lish, my mom and my mother-in-law for the love and support they provided so that I could lie in bed for two weeks. Without them, I’m not sure what I would have done. When I was sick I wrote in this blog that Alan didn’t provide me good enough care, and I feel badly about that now.
I am grateful for the illness because as illness does so well, it pushed me to make the decision to change what needed changing. It forced me to admit that some things weren’t working. It forced be to experience and purge a lot of old gunk, like feeling unlovable and like a failure and all of that. Things will be better from here on out because of that–at least, it will in the career domain of my life.
My astrological chart is somewhat of a mess right now, and, in my mind, this is contributing to the challenges that have been presented to me lately. It tells me I will feel like I’ve lost my way until March of 2021. Bracing myself. So far, it’s true.